An Open Letter to My Brothers: #MeToo Is Not About You

As a child, I suffered several severe asthma attacks, two of which hospitalized me.  The second time I must have been maybe nine or ten years old, not breathing, lying in an emergency room bed, while a nurse kept laboriously shoving an IV needle into my right arm and then just as excruciatingly drawing it back out because she had missed my vein...again.  And I was Not.Breathing.

Meantime, like an enthusiastic Foley artist from Hell, someone else down the row of curtained beds was howling.

I concentrated on three things: drawing in any bit of air, not punching the nurse in the face as she missed my vein again, and trying to tell myself that the person howling was probably having their leg amputated without anesthesia, so who was I to complain?

Finally, they got the IV in me, put the oxygen tent around me, stuffed more oxygen up my nose, and I had breath enough to grab a passing nurse and ask what the screaming patient was suffering from.

"Oh," the nurse said, rolling her eyes.  "That guy's got an ear ache."

Silencing the Silence Breakers

I bring this story up, because I've been thinking about it ever since I've seen the steady push to silence the Silence Breakers who began #metoo.

The complaint especially from my Christian and/or Conservative brothers is that they are not sexual aggressors.  That, in fact, they as white men have been silenced because of their gender and ethnicity.  That they need to be protected from what they fear might be a "witch hunt" by those "evil feminists" always out to emasculate men.

And you know what?  Fair enough.

I grew up in the 80's and 90's with Second Wave Feminism which did play itself out as being against things: against the patriarchy, the nuclear family, the church...even against "feminine" identifiers.  And as the daughter and sister of white, heterosexual, cis-gendered, family-oriented, religious men, I have witnessed the men in my life being silenced or belittled from news outlets of popular opinion to, more practically, HR departments enacting policy that got my dad laid off in the name of diversity and plunged all of us - including his daughters - into poverty.

So, I get it.

But here's the thing, gents: right now, you've got an ear ache.  And right now, your sisters are not breathing.

How to Care For Your Feminist

The thing about the #metoo movement is that it's built up of decades' worth of sexual harassment - whether overt or covert.  It's not something that's happening now, it's a reality that the majority of women have to contend with on a daily basis.  That we are, even months later, still dealing with.  The only difference in October was that we were all brave enough to share this private trauma at the same time in the hopes that you would listen.
     #MeToo not new trauma; it's only new to you.
Just like the traumas my brothers and sisters of color bear every day are, unfortunately, not new.  I only have the privilege of their daily heartaches being news to me.  And therefore, I have the privilege, as 'twere, of forgetting their reality, because it's not my problem.  This is a privilege, and have to work hard to remember to listen, believe, and be an ally.  Just like that fellow got over his ear ache and went on to live his life without having to think about it again.  But every day many women live with the spectre of sexist trauma, just as I live with the fact that I need to make decisions that affect my career based on whether or not I'm able to breathe.

So I want to talk to you, my brothers, about what you can do now.  Because what we need from you now is for you to keep listening.

The Circle of Trauma

A few years ago, a breast cancer survivor was told by one of her colleagues that the colleague "wanted, she needed to visit Susan after the surgery."  The problem?  Susan was too exhausted to have visitors.  Her colleague promptly told Susan, "This isn't just about you."

"It's not?" Susan wondered. "My breast cancer is not about me? It's about you?"

Susan then wrote an excellent article about how to care for people in trauma called "The Ring Theory."  The general idea is that the person to whom the trauma is happening is in the center, and that only care should flow towards them.  Perhaps from close family members or friends.  Naturally, though, whatever the person in the center is feeling will have an effect on their confidants, who in turn will need support.

So, say, Susan is in the middle, dealing day to day with battling breast cancer.  Her husband flows support in; Susan can vent out.  But her husband is growing weary and frustrated.  Rather than close off Susan, or venting his frustrations inward, he finds his own circle of friends and family and vents outwards to them.  And so on.
Image courtesy of Cascadia Workshops
    Care in.  Vent out.
Now apply this to the #metoo movement.  For years, really since Eve, women have been battling sexism - both culturally and personally.  Every woman who put up a #metoo story has multiple instances to share; multiple wounds; their own personal cancers and asthmas that they weren't born with - that were inflicted on them.  Toxically, one might say.

In one heroic effort, women put up the hashtag.  And you may say: well, how heroic can it be to put up a damn hashtag?  I'll get to that in a moment.  But trust me, it weren't easy.  In one heroic moment, every woman who put up #metoo admitted that for years they'd been poisoned, had cancer, weren't breathing.  Were in need of being the one in the middle of the circle of trauma - and not the ones caring for the fellow with an ear ache.

There was response.  For the first time in millennia, there was response.  Some of the worst offenders were ejected from their seats of power.  For a time, husbands, brothers, fathers, bosses, friends offered care in, even as they nervously began to look over their shoulder, worried that any youthful indiscretions might bite them in the bum.

And slowly - or really, fairly swiftly in the grand course of a bored news cycle - the circle of trauma stopped.  As men started up with their old ear ache: venting in, wanting care to come out.  OK, already: you had your #metoo moment.  Now back to us.

But...this isn't about you.  This is about the women whom you love.  And again, we really need you to listen.

My Day With #MeToo

I remember the day I saw the first #metoo hashtag, as I blearily wandered around in my morning routine, checking Facebook.  A dear friend had posted it, along with the now famous note:
     "If all the women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted wrote 'Me too.' as a status, we might give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem."
I saw my friend's post - a woman I greatly respect - but still scoffed.  Personally, I hate memes, and tend to roll my eyes at trends.

But at the day wore on, and more and more of my friends began posting #metoo, some with their stories attached, I reconsidered.

My next inclination was to say: "Oh, but not me."  After all, I have several friends, too many, who have been raped.  Some repeatedly.  So yes, #metoo for them...but not...for me?  But then I thought further about the fellow who tried to abduct me in Paris, and who forced me to hold his hand and kissed me in a really brutal way, and...

But I'd gotten over that, right?  I mean, I fled from Paris and went into a minor breakdown back in Austria.  But...I was totally better.  Nope.  Nope.  Not me.  Except...

Oh, right.  There was that guy who sexually harassed me in high school.  The quarterback who pinned me against the bleachers and made suggestive comments.  And then took the opportunity in weight lifting to give me massages.  And who tried to call me out in front of the whole school cafeteria. 

But...but...although I'd been scared the first time, I'd turned the rest of the times into jokes, and even enjoyed the attention by the end, and that excused pinning me against the bleachers and asking if it was good for me, right?  Because: noNot me.

Except that...

There was the neighborhood kid who looked up my skirt and was generally a jackass.  And there was some pretty awful stuff that happened when I was seven or eight years old with other neighborhood kids that I'm not going to go into here, and about which I still feel guilty.  Not to mention the guy masturbating on the train across from me just the other day.  Not to mention the guy in Italy who groped me on the bus.  Not to mention the occasional wolf whistles in town. Not to mention the guy who slapped my ass while I was walking to the train in Harlem.  Not to mention the actor who used that one time to try to stick his tongue down my throat.  Not to mention that dickwad who used me to cheat on his girlfriend, said he loved me, left me, begged me to be silent, and got off scott free, leaving me to suffer three years of traumaNot to mention...not to mention...not to mention...

The subtler attacks.  The jobs I'd been refused from high school on because I wasn't fuckable enough for the pervy director.  The jobs I'd been refused because I was a woman who knew her mind, and this was a place run by guys in over their heads.  The jobs I'd gotten where I'd had to endure being hugged and kissed as a form of greeting, while the men all shook each other's hands.  The jobs I'd gotten where I was the only woman in the room, and I watched the job I was in the middle of doing being given away to another man who had just admitted he wasn't prepped for the job.

So, yeah.  Yeah.  Yeah.  ME.  FUCKING.  TOO. 

Lice in a Tea Cozy: An Analogy

The problem of opening up one part of a trauma is that it opens up all the traumas.

Talking with my girlfriends in the weeks and months that followed, we acknowledged how shaken, how hypersensitive, how high-alert we all felt.  How, in fact, by having spent the day examining our lives in the light of #metoo, we were reliving those same traumas - but this time without the safety net of recontextualizing, excusing, or laughing our traumas away.

This past summer, I wrote an article looking at how masculine vs. feminine brains generally tend to process experience and emotion.

One of the most fascinating aspects I discovered was that it appears that men tend to have stronger back-to-front reactions to experiences, which encourages a man to either "fix or ditch" the experience.  To put it in terms of #metoo, and why men might not have noticed what was happening daily to the women around them, since the men were not being harassed (or harassing), it was nothing they could fix and so they ditched the memory altogether.  Hence, when they witnessed the next time that same woman was harassed, the men hadn't maintained the previous memory of what had happened the last time, and likely ditched this time as well.

Contrast this to how a woman processes emotion.  Studies found that in general female brains process across hemispheres, as well as storing experiences immediately and automatically in the amygdala - which is the memory and emotion center of the brain.  Essentially, as a woman experiences something, it gets filed and cross filed with every previous association of similar experiences, which then encourages whatever action she has deemed fittest from all her previous experiences.  To put it in terms of #metoo, every time a woman experiences sexual harassment, it goes to the same memory bank as the previous one.  So that to access that one time that one guy did that one thing is to access every time that particular trauma was stored. And then to enact whatever her coping mechanism might be - generally, making the trauma "safe" not only from herself, but also from you, my dear brothers.

To use an analogy:

Imagine that every time a traumatic occurrence happens it's a piece of lice.
  • A man's brain is generally wired to either accept the lice or to disregard it and pretend there were never any lice at all.
  • A woman's brain is generally wired not to ditch the lice, but to keep and "make safe" the lice - possibly by knitting a nice tea cozy and covering over every little bug.  The woman keeps having men fling lice on her.  No problem.  She pops it in the tea cozy.  And it's like no one has to know and everything is fine.  Another lice?  No problem.  Laugh it off.  And it's funny to have lice.  And let's just pop that in the tea cozy, shall we?  And so on and so on.
And it's easy, isn't it my brothers, to pretend we all like lice.

But on the day of #metoo, one by one we women took off those tea cozies, and had to deal with every wriggling worm that life had shoved on us.  And some were so monstrous, we were able to tear them down (for now).  And others...well, gentlemen, I imagine if you're afraid of a witch hunt, it's because you're wondering whether the girl you pinned up against the lockers in high school remembers, and whether she was thinking of you while she typed out, in fear and trembling:

#me.fucking.too.

A New Hope

Ultimately, we're going to need new legislation that favors victims rather than protecting predators.  Hopefully, that legislation will start to be enacted this year.  But in the meantime, my brothers, I'm going to challenge you to step up to the plate...and do nothing.
      Listen.  Care in, vent out.  
Just because a few months have passed, and we've chopped off a hydra head or two, doesn't mean the battle's done.  Far from it.  And you know what?  That girl you groped, that woman whose "No," you didn't respect, or just this blogger you're calling names in the comments...we're gonna forgive the Hell outta you.

Eventually.

Maybe not today.

And only if you're sorry.

But for God's sake: keep listening.

Because the tea cozy has come off, we've got some things to say.

~*~


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Comments

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  4. Me too is like any "movement" out there. Some of it is good, some not. Some of the conclusions are valid, some aren't. Each case should be judged on its own merits.

    ReplyDelete
  5. My name is Promise Dickson am from Texas USA. I want to share a testimony of how Dr. OLU herbal mixture cream saves me from shame and disgrace, my penis was a big problem to me as the size was really so embarrassing,and i was also having weak erection problem. I can make love to my wife and my penis was just too small my name is Promise dickson Finch am from Texas USA. I want to share a testimony of how Dr. OLU herbal mixture cream saves me from shame and disgrace, my penis was a big problem to me as the size was really so embarrassing,and i was also having weak erection problem. I can make love to my wife and my penis was just too small a full grown man like me having 4 inches penis and to worsen it i don't last in sex i cant even last two minutes it was really a thing of shame to me. My wife was really tired of me because my sex life was very poor,she never enjoyed sex,i was always thinking and searching for solutions everywhere until when i saw a testimony of how Dr. OLU. herbal mixture cream have been helping people regarding their sex life, so i decided to give him a try and to my greatest surprise in less than two weeks of taking the herbs my penis grow to 8 inches i couldn't believe my eyes and as i speak now my penis is now 8 inches and i do not have weak erection again. I can make love to my wife longer in bed. And my marriage is now stable,my wife now enjoy me very well in bed. You can contact him via (drolusolutionhome@gmail.com) You can contact him today and get your problem solved.Call +2348140654426 .." or you can also contact him through his what-app +238140654426

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

      1) Love Spells
      2) Lost Love Spells
      3) Divorce Spells
      4) Marriage Spells
      5) Binding Spell.
      6) Breakup Spells
      7) Lottery spell


      Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

      1) Love Spells
      2) Lost Love Spells
      3) Divorce Spells
      4) Marriage Spells
      5) Binding Spell.
      6) Breakup Spells
      7) Lottery spell

      Delete
  6. I am very happy for posting on this blog on how a great spell caster helped me to bring back the love of my life. I know there are lots of women like me out there who has done so much to have back their Husband, I am here to tell you the answer is right here. I sincerely believe if there are up to five spell casters like Dr. Oduwa this world would be a better place, I have seen people complaining on how fake spell castes promised to help them but couldn't. with Dr Oduwa I tell you your problem is already solved because i experienced alot when my Husband and I had been apart for 4years and I couldn't bear living without him, I have tried everything to have him back but nothing was working until I saw numerous testimonies about a spell caster call Dr Oduwa on how great his work is. I contacted him immediately and follow the step that he ask and in the next 48 hours my husband called me and was eager for my forgiveness and that he wished nothing more than to have me in his arms forever. I filled so much joy and happiness that I found Dr Oduwa. I hope you all here will find this testimony of mine and get your husband back in just 48 hours Oduwa contact is droduwaspellhome01@gmail.com you can also call or whatsapp him on +2348136354191.

    ReplyDelete
  7. HOW DR AZIBA HELPED ME ENLARGE MY PENIS SIZE FROM 3.5 INCHES TO 11INCHES LONG AND 8.0 GROWTH
    I got married 2 years ago and it just seemed that there was no excitement in my sex life. My dysfunction to perform to the best of my abilities in bed made it harder for my wife and me to have a good time during sex. And i was having the feelings that she may decide to get a divorce one day. I knew something had to be done in order to improve my sex life and to save my marriage because my marriage was already falling apart, so when i was on my Facebook page i came across a story of how Dr Aziba helped him enlarged his penis to 7ins better.so i Immediately copied the Email address of the Dr and explained to him my problem,he gave me some simply instruction which i must follow and i did easily and my friends Today, i am the happiest man on Earth, All Thanks to Dr Aziba for saving my marriage and making me a real man today.i asked him about some popular diseases like HERPES,HIV AIDS,HEPATITES,DIABETIS, CANCERS, HEART DISEASE, etc....... which are affecting most people he said there is no disease without a cure , he has it all...You can as well reach the Dr below for help on your problem, for he has the solution to all...
    Email:[ PRIESTAZIBASOLUTIONCENTER@GMAIL COM ]
    WhatsAPP DR [ :+2348100368288 ]

    ReplyDelete
  8. What a miracle i never believe there is cure because my doctor tested me Herpes positive and she told me there is no cure, i’m very happy today that i’m having a free life without this sickness, i can remember some months ago when i was crying all through the night and day that i can’t get cured from this sickness, i found this herbal man email on internet when i was doing research on cure for Herpes i contacted him to found out if i can get help from this sickness, i was so surprise when he told me that he have the herbs cure to it and he sent me the herbal in less down 2-3 days i was so happy when i get someone giving me hope that he can cured me i took the herbal for just 2 weeks, when i went for test after taking the herbal i found out that i am cured i was so happy and surprise, i want to use this opportunity to inform you that there is cured to Herpes you can also contact him for his help as soon as possible so that you can get rid of this sickness once and for all you can reach him through via email: Chiefdrlucky@gmail.com or
    Whats App him on +2348132777335
    Website : http://chiefdrluckysolutionhome.website2.me/
    You can also contact him on any sickness in this he all have the herbal cure to it

    ReplyDelete
  9. HOW DR AZIBA HELPED ME ENLARGE MY PENIS SIZE FROM 3.5 INCHES TO 11INCHES LONG AND 8.0 GROWTH . contact Dr Aziba via Email: priestazibasolutioncenter@gmail.com or chat him on WhatsApp: +2348100368288 .
    My name is Herbert Wilson Out of respect for you and your good work I must make this testimony known to all. I've been to other Doctors without getting my Penis Enlargement. I just wished I came to you earlier,i got the best from you. My Penis is much more bigger now after many years of battle, I finally got my penis Enlarged by Doctor Aziba .His product worked wonders and my Penis is 11inch bigger now. It's a miracle! He suddenly start becoming bigger from the day i start using the product Dr Aziba sent to me, I'm really short of words and joyful,you are a God sent to me and my entire family.. And now i am a joyful man once again.Thank you so much Dr Aziba To everyone who is looking for a NATURAL ENLARGEMENT PRODUCT should contact Dr Aziba On Email: priestazibasolutioncenter@gmail.com or call him on WhatsApp: +2348100368288

    ReplyDelete
  10. HOW DR PERFECT ENLARGEMENT CREAM HELP ME TO ENLARGE MY PENIS YOU CAN ADD HIM UP ON WHATSAPP +1(256) 251 3614

    My name is David Richardson from USA I want to share a testimony of how Dr Perfect herbal mixture cream saved me from shame and disgrace, my penis was a big problem to me as the size was really so embarrassing and I was also having weak erection problem. I can't make love to my wife and my penis was just too small, a full grown man like me having 3 inches penis and to worsen it I don't last long in sex I can't even last four minutes it was really a big shame to me. My wife was really tired of me because my sex life was very poor, she never enjoyed sex, I was always thinking and searching for solutions everywhere until when I saw a testimony of how Dr Perfect herbal mixture cream have been helping people regarding their sex life, so I decided to give him a try and to my greatest surprise in less than one week of taking the herbs my penis grow to 10 inches I couldn't believe my eyes and as I speak now my penis is now 10 inches long and I don't have weak erection anymore. I can make love to my wife longer in bed. And my marriage is now stable my wife is now enjoy me very well in bed. All thanks to Dr Perfect for enlarging my penis he indeed save my marriage. You can contact him at solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com or you can add him up on WhatsApp +1(256) 251 3614. He also specializes in the following things
    Herpes virus
    Cancer
    Hsv
    Chronic venous disease
    and others

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

      1) Love Spells
      2) Lost Love Spells
      3) Divorce Spells
      4) Marriage Spells
      5) Binding Spell.
      6) Breakup Spells
      7) Lottery spell


      Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

      1) Love Spells
      2) Lost Love Spells
      3) Divorce Spells
      4) Marriage Spells
      5) Binding Spell.
      6) Breakup Spells
      7) Lottery spell

      Delete
  11. My name is Bawani Richardson from USA I want to share a testimony of how Dr Perfect herbal mixture cream saved me from shame and disgrace, my penis was a big problem to me as the size was really so embarrassing and I was also having weak erection problem. I can't make love to my wife and my penis was just too small, a full grown man like me having 3 inches penis and to worsen it I don't last long in sex I can't even last four minutes it was really a big shame to me. My wife was really tired of me because my sex life was very poor, she never enjoyed sex, I was always thinking and searching for solutions everywhere until when I saw a testimony of how Dr Oduma herbal mixture cream have been helping people regarding their sex life, so I decided to give him a try and to my greatest surprise in less than one week of taking the herbs my penis grow to 10 inches I couldn't believe my eyes and as I speak now my penis is now 10 inches long and I don't have weak erection anymore. I can make love to my wife longer in bed. And my marriage is now stable my wife is now enjoy me very well in bed. All thanks to Dr Oduma for enlarging my penis he indeed save my marriage. You can contact him at drodumaherbalhome5@gmail.com or you can add him up on WhatsApp +2348125355039. He also specializes in the following things
    Herpes virus
    Cancer
    Hsv
    Chronic venous disease
    and others

    ReplyDelete
  12. CONTACT DR PERFECT TODAY VIA EMAIL solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com AND GET YOUR BROKEN MARRIAGE RESTORED BACK WITHIN 24 HOURS

    Hello everyone am Lucas Martinez from USA, after 15 years of marriage, me and my wife were living happily together we loved each other so much and I Loved my family they were my top priority, until one morning me and my wife had a little argument which I know every couples do have because there are no perfect couples in this world after the argument I went to work when I came home I couldn't find my wife and our kids she also packed her bags and that of the kids and left I tried calling her but I couldn't reach her I went to her friend's house but they couldn't tell me where to find her, I was frustrated I didn't know what to do I started drinking alcohol every day and night I stopped going to work it was a difficult thing for me because she and my kids means everything to me it's was like part of my body left me I couldn't function well, one day I was browsing on the Internet when I saw a testimony of someone testifying of a man called Dr Perfect and how he brought back his wife within 24 hours I didn't think twice about it I messaged him and told him everything that happened between me and my wife and he said he find my problem very easy for him to solve he also told me to trust him that my wife will come back and I told him I trust him and he asked for some information which I gave him, 24 hours later my wife came back home with the kids I was so surprised to see her it was like a dream to me she started crying and apologizing to me I told her it's okay I forgive her that am happy she is back we are now living happily together. If you are heart broken because your wife or husband left you email this powerful love spell caster called Dr Perfect via email

    solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com

    You can also message him on WhatsApp +1(256)-251-3614

    ReplyDelete
  13. CONTACT DR PERFECT TODAY VIA EMAIL solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com AND GET YOUR BROKEN MARRIAGE RESTORED BACK WITHIN 24 HOURS

    Hello everyone am Lucas Martinez from USA, after 15 years of marriage, me and my wife were living happily together we loved each other so much and I Loved my family they were my top priority, until one morning me and my wife had a little argument which I know every couples do have because there are no perfect couples in this world after the argument I went to work when I came home I couldn't find my wife and our kids she also packed her bags and that of the kids and left I tried calling her but I couldn't reach her I went to her friend's house but they couldn't tell me where to find her, I was frustrated I didn't know what to do I started drinking alcohol every day and night I stopped going to work it was a difficult thing for me because she and my kids means everything to me it's was like part of my body left me I couldn't function well, one day I was browsing on the Internet when I saw a testimony of someone testifying of a man called Dr Perfect and how he brought back his wife within 24 hours I didn't think twice about it I messaged him and told him everything that happened between me and my wife and he said he find my problem very easy for him to solve he also told me to trust him that my wife will come back and I told him I trust him and he asked for some information which I gave him, 24 hours later my wife came back home with the kids I was so surprised to see her it was like a dream to me she started crying and apologizing to me I told her it's okay I forgive her that am happy she is back we are now living happily together. If you are heart broken because your wife or husband left you email this powerful love spell caster called Dr Perfect via email

    solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com

    You can also message him on WhatsApp +1(256)-251-3614

    ReplyDelete
  14. I am very happy today with my family. My name is rose living in USA, My
    husband left me for a good 3 years now, and i love him so much, i have been
    looking for a way to get him back since then. i have tried many options but
    he did not come back, until i met a friend that darted me to Dr.love a
    spell caster, who helped me to bring back my husband after 2 weeks. Me and
    my husband are living happily together today, That man is great, you can
    contact him via email drlovetemple@gmail.com Now i will advice any serious
    persons that found themselves in this kind of problem to contact him now a
    fast solution without stress.. He always hello, now i call him my
    father.contact him now he is always online email drlovetemple@gmail.com or whatsapp number +2348067378691

    ReplyDelete
  15. Hello viewers around the Globe, I was despondent because i had a very small penis, about 2.5 inches soft and 4 inches hard not nice enough to satisfy a woman, i have been in so many relationship, but cut off because of my situation, i have used so many product which doctors for me, but none could offer me the help i searched for. i saw some few comments on the INTERNET about this specialist called Dr,OLU and decided to contact him on his email: Drolusolutinthome@gmail.com) so I decided to give his herbal product a try. i emailed him and he got back to me, he gave me some comforting words with his herbal pills for Penis Enlargement, Within 3 week of it, i began to feel the enlargement was surprised when she said that she is satisfied with my sex and i have got a large penis. Am so happy, thanks to Dr OLU I also learn that Dr OLU also help with Breast Enlargement Hips and Bums Enlargement etc.. If you are in any situation with a little Penis, weak ejaculation, small breast_hips_bums do get to Dr OLU now for help on his email (Drolusolutionhome@gmail.com) or add him on whatsapp line +2348140654426

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

      1) Love Spells
      2) Lost Love Spells
      3) Divorce Spells
      4) Marriage Spells
      5) Binding Spell.
      6) Breakup Spells
      7) Lottery spell


      Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

      1) Love Spells
      2) Lost Love Spells
      3) Divorce Spells
      4) Marriage Spells
      5) Binding Spell.
      6) Breakup Spells
      7) Lottery spell

      Delete
  16. Hello everyone, my name is ALFREED SIANG i am here to say a big thank you to my doctor DR OLU who helped me enlarge my penis.i have never had a happy relationship in my life because of my inability to perform well due to my small penis, due to frustration,i went online in search of solution to ending my predicament and than i came across testimony on how DR OLU has helped them, so i contacted him and he promised to help me with penis enlargement,i doubted at first but i gave him a trial and he sent me the product which i used according to his prescription and in less than a week,i saw changes in my penis and it grow to the size i wanted and since then,i am now a happy man and no lady complains again about my penis.if you also need the services of my doctor,you can also contact him on his email..drolusolutionhome@gmail.com or his whataspp is +2348140654426





    Hello everyone, my name is ALFREED SIANG i am here to say a big thank you to my doctor DR OLU who helped me enlarge my penis.i have never had a happy relationship in my life because of my inability to perform well due to my small penis, due to frustration,i went online in search of solution to ending my predicament and than i came across testimony on how DR OLU has helped them, so i contacted him and he promised to help me with penis enlargement,i doubted at first but i gave him a trial and he sent me the product which i used according to his prescription and in less than a week,i saw changes in my penis and it grow to the size i wanted and since then,i am now a happy man and no lady complains again about my penis.if you also need the services of my doctor,you can also contact him on his email..drolusolutionhome@gmail.com or his whataspp is +2348140654426

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hello everyone, am very happy to share this little awesome testimony about Dr olu a great herbal doctor who help me enlarge my penis size.3.2 cm to 8.3 cm longer with his herbal cream mixture, my girlfriend is now so amazed with the autonomous size of my penis , if you you are also in need of help on how to enlarge your penis to become bigger and stronger I adverse you to contact Dr on his email (drolusolutionhome@gmail.com) ) you or contact on whatsapp number +2348140654426 because he is one of the best herbal doctor that i can only show you up to, if your penis is 4.2 cm and want to get it reach 9.2 cm within three weeks i Dr olu is also specialized on obeo m breast and boobs enlargement i advise you to contact him for help

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

    1) Love Spells
    2) Lost Love Spells
    3) Divorce Spells
    4) Marriage Spells
    5) Binding Spell.
    6) Breakup Spells
    7) Lottery spell

    Hello, My name is BRANDY KELVIN from USA, I want to testify to the general public on how my relationship was restored back by the great power’s of Dr,IFADE After three months of loneliness, my ex-lover called me after my contact with Dr,IFADE that he want us to come back and start a good home again, now we are happily married with a kids. All thanks to Dr,IFADE for his spiritual help. You can contact him on his email if you have similar problem, or any solution you may need, job, divorce, promotion in you place of work, healing,money spell, etc.you can Contact him via email: [ifadesolutionspell31@gmail.com] OR you can also reach him via whatsapp number +2349060120490

    1) Love Spells
    2) Lost Love Spells
    3) Divorce Spells
    4) Marriage Spells
    5) Binding Spell.
    6) Breakup Spells
    7) Lottery spell

    ReplyDelete
  19. I am Miss alisha,From USA. I will start by saying to all that have experience heart break and also cant do with out there lover should please stop here and read up my story, So as you will know how to go solving or getting your ex back from this spell caster..AND AGAIN I WILL WANT TO ALSO TELL ALL THAT THIS SPELL CASTER I WILL WANT TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD ABOUT IS HARMLESS AND DO NOT HAVE ANY SIDE EFFECT, BUT TO RESTORE AND GIVE YOU BACK WHAT YOU DESERVE, COS WHEN I MEET WITH THIS SPELL CASTER THAT WAS INTRODUCED TO ME BY THE WIFE OF MY BOSS IN MY WORKING PLACE, HE MADE IT CLEAR THAT HE CAN CAST SPELL ON SO MANY OTHER PROBLEMS EXCEPT IN GETTING YOUR EX OR MAKING YOUR LOVER TO LOVE YOU MORE THAT WILL SUITE YOU. Last year December, My lover was cheating on me and was not also give me the attention that a man should give to a woman,And really that was troubling my mind and tearing my heart apart to the extent that i was not concentrating in the office the way i use to before the break up by my lover.And before that incident,I always see how my boss use to love his wife so much. I was bringing to think that i was not doing the right thing to him that will make him love me forever,So i really gathered my courage and went to my boss wife office to ask her the secret that made her husband love her so dearly,In the first place she refused in telling me,She asked me why i am asking her such a question,That if is it not normal for every man to love his wife.I told her the reason that made me ask her about this question,That my lover started cheating on me lately,When i knelt down before her for her to see my seriousness in this issue that i went to ask her,She opened up to me by telling me that i should not tell anybody about what she want to tell me,The wife to my boss started to say to me that she used a very powerful spell on his husband to love her,And the spell that she used is harmless, But the spell is just to make him love her and never to look for any other woman except her. I QUICKLY ASK HER HOW DID SHE GET TO KNOW THIS GREAT,POWER,DURABLE AND PERFECT WORK SPELL CASTER,she said that a friend of hers also introduce her to him. Then i also ask her how i can meet with this spell caster.SHE SAID EVERYTHING TO ME,THAT THE NAME OF THIS SPELL CASTER IS Dr.AZEN .My next question to her was how can i get this wonderful spell caster,She said she is going to give me the email of the spell caster for me to contact him for my problem,Really she gave to me this spell caster email:[azentemple@gmail.com]or what'sapp +2349038299828. and i contacted him and explained all to him,And after every thing that needed to be done by the spell caster, In the next two days, My lover that hated me so much came to house begging for forgiveness and i was so glad that i have finally gotten my heart desire..I was so grateful to this spell caster for what he has done for my life.. So i made a promise to him that i will always come

    ReplyDelete
  20. I am Miss alisha,From USA. I will start by saying to all that have experience heart break and also cant do with out there lover should please stop here and read up my story, So as you will know how to go solving or getting your ex back from this spell caster..AND AGAIN I WILL WANT TO ALSO TELL ALL THAT THIS SPELL CASTER I WILL WANT TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD ABOUT IS HARMLESS AND DO NOT HAVE ANY SIDE EFFECT, BUT TO RESTORE AND GIVE YOU BACK WHAT YOU DESERVE, COS WHEN I MEET WITH THIS SPELL CASTER THAT WAS INTRODUCED TO ME BY THE WIFE OF MY BOSS IN MY WORKING PLACE, HE MADE IT CLEAR THAT HE CAN CAST SPELL ON SO MANY OTHER PROBLEMS EXCEPT IN GETTING YOUR EX OR MAKING YOUR LOVER TO LOVE YOU MORE THAT WILL SUITE YOU. Last year December, My lover was cheating on me and was not also give me the attention that a man should give to a woman,And really that was troubling my mind and tearing my heart apart to the extent that i was not concentrating in the office the way i use to before the break up by my lover.And before that incident,I always see how my boss use to love his wife so much. I was bringing to think that i was not doing the right thing to him that will make him love me forever,So i really gathered my courage and went to my boss wife office to ask her the secret that made her husband love her so dearly,In the first place she refused in telling me,She asked me why i am asking her such a question,That if is it not normal for every man to love his wife.I told her the reason that made me ask her about this question,That my lover started cheating on me lately,When i knelt down before her for her to see my seriousness in this issue that i went to ask her,She opened up to me by telling me that i should not tell anybody about what she want to tell me,The wife to my boss started to say to me that she used a very powerful spell on his husband to love her,And the spell that she used is harmless, But the spell is just to make him love her and never to look for any other woman except her. I QUICKLY ASK HER HOW DID SHE GET TO KNOW THIS GREAT,POWER,DURABLE AND PERFECT WORK SPELL CASTER,she said that a friend of hers also introduce her to him. Then i also ask her how i can meet with this spell caster.SHE SAID EVERYTHING TO ME,THAT THE NAME OF THIS SPELL CASTER IS Dr.AZEN .My next question to her was how can i get this wonderful spell caster,She said she is going to give me the email of the spell caster for me to contact him for my problem,Really she gave to me this spell caster email:[azentemple@gmail.com]or what'sapp +2349038299828. and i contacted him and explained all to him,And after every thing that needed to be done by the spell caster, In the next two days, My lover that hated me so much came to house begging for forgiveness and i was so glad that i have finally gotten my heart desire..I was so grateful to this spell caster for what he has done for my life.. So i made a promise to him that i will always come

    ReplyDelete
  21. HOW DR HARRY HELPED ME ENLARGE MY PENIS SIZE FROM 4 INCHES TO 12 INCHES LONG AND 8.0 GIRTH
    hello everyone this is serious and real i want to tell the whole world about how DR HARRY HERBAL MIXTURE CREAM helped me enlarge my penis size ..i have trying since 19 years of age to enlarge my penis but none rendered me the help i want i have used several vaccines,penis pump,surgery,online creams from USA,CANADA ,AUSTRALIA and many more but none of them could enlarge my penis i was really frustrated and tired of living because my penis was too small ,imagine a cute and handsome 39 years old man like me having 3.5 inches and to make it worse i was having erectile dysfunction which was so annoying to me,my girlfriends have left me because of my small penis ....to GOD be the glory as i was searching for help on a FACEBOOK page i saw one Mr ADAMS WILLSHERE from ENGLAND testifying of how DR HARRY HERBAL MIXTURE CREAM enlarge his penis and healed his grand mom hepatitis B .so i quickly visited and sent him an email on his website link https://drharryherbaltempl.wixsite.com/solutiontemple and he replied me and gave me comforting words and told me all i need to do and i was surprise he did not ask for money ,,i got his cream and he sent it to me through united parcel service (UPS)and i got it 4 days later and used the cream just as he told me and its just 11 days of using his herbal mixture cream my penis is now 11 inches long and 8.0 flaccidity am so happy to feel like a man in the bedroom at last so if you need penis enlargement,DIABETES 1/2 CURE,HERPES CURE,HIV/AIDS,CANCER,LUPUS DISEASE,PILE,LOW SPERM COUNT,PREMATURE EJACULATION,ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION,breast enlargement,weak erection,erectile dysfunction cure and many sexual relation cure do not hesitate to email him now drharrysolution@gmail.com or website https://drharryherbaltempl.wixsite.com/solutiontemple you can also call or whatsapp him on +2349036417079 thanks

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  22. I am Miss alisha,From USA. I will start by saying to all that have experience heart break and also cant do with out there lover should please stop here and read up my story, So as you will know how to go solving or getting your ex back from this spell caster..AND AGAIN I WILL WANT TO ALSO TELL ALL THAT THIS SPELL CASTER I WILL WANT TO TELL THE WHOLE WORLD ABOUT IS HARMLESS AND DO NOT HAVE ANY SIDE EFFECT, BUT TO RESTORE AND GIVE YOU BACK WHAT YOU DESERVE, COS WHEN I MEET WITH THIS SPELL CASTER THAT WAS INTRODUCED TO ME BY THE WIFE OF MY BOSS IN MY WORKING PLACE, HE MADE IT CLEAR THAT HE CAN CAST SPELL ON SO MANY OTHER PROBLEMS EXCEPT IN GETTING YOUR EX OR MAKING YOUR LOVER TO LOVE YOU MORE THAT WILL SUITE YOU. Last year December, My lover was cheating on me and was not also give me the attention that a man should give to a woman,And really that was troubling my mind and tearing my heart apart to the extent that i was not concentrating in the office the way i use to before the break up by my lover.And before that incident,I always see how my boss use to love his wife so much. I was bringing to think that i was not doing the right thing to him that will make him love me forever,So i really gathered my courage and went to my boss wife office to ask her the secret that made her husband love her so dearly,In the first place she refused in telling me,She asked me why i am asking her such a question,That if is it not normal for every man to love his wife.I told her the reason that made me ask her about this question,That my lover started cheating on me lately,When i knelt down before her for her to see my seriousness in this issue that i went to ask her,She opened up to me by telling me that i should not tell anybody about what she want to tell me,The wife to my boss started to say to me that she used a very powerful spell on his husband to love her,And the spell that she used is harmless, But the spell is just to make him love her and never to look for any other woman except her. I QUICKLY ASK HER HOW DID SHE GET TO KNOW THIS GREAT,POWER,DURABLE AND PERFECT WORK SPELL CASTER,she said that a friend of hers also introduce her to him. Then i also ask her how i can meet with this spell caster.SHE SAID EVERYTHING TO ME,THAT THE NAME OF THIS SPELL CASTER IS Dr.AZEN .My next question to her was how can i get this wonderful spell caster,She said she is going to give me the email of the spell caster for me to contact him for my problem,Really she gave to me this spell caster email:[azentemple@gmail.com]or what'sapp +2349038299828. and i contacted him and explained all to him,And after every thing that needed to be done by the spell caster, In the next two days, My lover that hated me so much came to house begging for forgiveness and i was so glad that i have finally gotten my heart desire..I was so grateful to this spell caster for what he has done for my life.. So i made a promise to him that i will always come

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  23. Hi Friends i am so glad to writing this article today to tell the world how Dr Emmanuel cured my HSV VIRUS,i have been detected with HSV-1 AND HSV-2 since five years ago, ever since then my life has been in complete bizarre and agony,i have used so many drugs that was prescribed to me by several doctors,but it didn't cure my HSV VIRUS neither did it reduce the pain,until a certain i was checking for solution in the internet,then miraculously came across Dr Emmanuel the powerful herbalist that cure numerous individuals HSV-1 AND HSV-2 INFECTION,then i contacted his whatsApp number at +2348140073965 or email: nativehealthclinic@gmail.com i explained everything to him and prepared a cure that cure my HSV-1 AND HSV-2 disease totally after receiving his herbal medicine, so my friends viewers why wait and be suffer when there is someone like Dr JOE that can cure any disease HIV/ CANCER/ HEPATITIS B VIRUS, you can contact his via : nativehealthclinic@gmail.com. or WHATSAPP +2348140073965 GOD BLESS YOU ALL?

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  24. This is a testimony that i will tell everyone to hear i have been married four 3years and on the 4years of my marriage another woman had a spell to take my husband away from me and my husband left me and the kids and we have suffered for 1year and 6 months until i meant a post where this man Dr Bakaba have helped someone and i decided to give him a try to help me bring my love husband home and believe me i just send my picture to him and that of my husband and after 3days as he have told me i saw a car drove into the house and behold it was my husband and he have come to me and the kids and that is why i am happy to make every one of you in similar to met with this man and have your lover back to your self His email ( bakabaspelltemple@gmail.com ) or call or WhatsApp him ( +2347063836098 ) he can also help on PREGNANCY SPELL get all your problem solve. No problem is too big for him to solve..Contact him THANKS Dr BAKABA

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  25. info@fivestarcourierservice.comMy husband was diagnosed with MND ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosis) when he was 69 years old 6 years ago. The Rilutek (riluzole) did very little to help him. The medical team did even less. His decline was rapid and devastating. The psychological support from the medical center was non-existent and if it were not for totalcureherbsfoundation .c om and the sensitive cure of their herbal formula he would have been not been alive today,there was significant improvement in the first 4 weeks of usage that gave us hope that he will be alive,His doctor put him on riluzole, letting us know there was no cure until we gave try on total cure herbal supplement that cure him totally from this disease after 15 weeks of his usage. There is nothing positive about cure ALS condition except for their herbal treatment .

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  26. This is the most wonderful thing i have ever experienced. I visited here online on the 17 June and i saw a marvelous testimony of Tracie Adana from United States on the forum about the good works DR.tunde I never believed it, because have never heard anything about such miracle before. No body would have been able to convince me about it not until DR.tunde did a marvelous work for me that restored my marriage of 4 years by getting back my husband back i just as i read on the internet. I'm Carolina peter I was truly shocked when my husband knelt down pleading for forgiveness to accept him back. I am really short of words to use to show my appreciation to DR.tunde For his a God sent to me and my entire family for divine restoration of my marriage. Contact him now for any kind of help via Email:babatundesolutioncentre1@gmail.com or you can contact his whats-app mobile line +2348143581382 Also specialize in treating all kinds of illness, HERPES VIRUS, HEPATITIS B, CANCER, BRAIN DISEASE, PREGNANCY, DIABETES AND MORE

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  27. My dream finally comes through i never believe this will happen to me, i am here to share my testimony how dr Oseiboh help me to cast death spell on my uncle who killed my parents because of his company, and the matter was taking to court and was not giving justice because i was not having any prove not until i came across this great spell caster online and i explain everything that happened to me and he promise to help me cast the spell within 48hours that i should send my uncle full name and his picture that is going to confess before he die which i did as he commanded.within 2days my uncle started confessing and finally die. am grateful for what dr Oseiboh did for me and with that i promise to share this testimony to all the viewers around the globe,If you are having similar issues please do contact him,you can contact dr Oseiboh for any death spell, such as to kill your superior in the office and take his or her place,love spell,lottery,pregnancy spell,divorce spell,stop court case and win any court problems,business spell, death spell to kill your father and inherit his wealth ,death spell to kill anyone who have scammed you in the past ,spell for increase in salaries, spell for promotion at the office, spell to get your ex lover back,money spell,if things is not working well in your life then you need to contact him now via email droseiboh12@gmail.com add him on whatsapp line or call +2347017565415.

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  28. Ever since my husband got me divorced for the past 2 years, i v'e not been my self. I was reviewing some post of how i could get back my husband then, i saw a testimony shared by Marina Choas from SWEDEN about a spell caster named Dr. tunde. I contacted Marina Chaos to confirm about how Dr. tunde helped her and she clarified everything to me of how he helped her and that gave me the courage to get in touch with Dr. tunde for help. Dr. tunde assured me that my days of sorrows will be over within 48hours after he has finished with his work. I followed his instructions he gave to me because i had the believe, faith, hope and trust in him. Verily i say to you today that i and my husband are back together and i can proudly say and testify to the world of what Dr. tunde did for me. Contact him today via E-mail: [ babatundesolutioncentre1@gmail.com ] OR call him or whatsapp him +2348143581382 if you seek his help.

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